Friday, December 07, 2007

Why Are Men Two-faced?

I thought of writing this article on long debatable topic when one of my very close female friends came up with this question after she had another big fight with her boyfriend. I suddenly realized that it's worth jotting down a few thoughts.

If I ever come across a museum that is dedicated to psychology I would definitely want this question to be there along with another thought provoker, which has always intrigued all male minds "Can anybody understand a woman?"

I would leave the second question to be answered by someone who is as idle as me and has same misconception about his/her IQ and EQ as I have. However, I believe these two questions are like two different sides of the same coin.

As far are as my view is concerned, I believe that all life or non life forms are multifaceted and men being one of them, are born that way. MULTIFACETED. I don't think any woman would ever have a problem with that quality until it starts creating trouble in her life. Some common examples being:
  1. Even the guys who drink too much, start having a problem when their female counterparts develop a similar tendency.
  2. Healthy flirting of guys suddenly starts symbolizing “loose character” when women want to have to a go at it.
I guess, any female reading this article would definitely want to add innumerable points to my list but then, that is not my purpose.

Let me try to put my point across by an example:
What will happen if I tie you up with a piece of elastic strap and then you try to get free from it by pulling it away. The most probable result:
It would try to grip you more tightly. In simpler words every action has an equal and opposite reaction(For the technically oriented minds that's the Newton's third law of motion)

I guess the analogy applies perfectly (I won't mind if a lot of people don't agree with my analogy) to the moot point in discussion. Hitherto, Men have been so used to dominate the women race that they just can't accept the changing face of women liberty and as this outward force of women liberalization grows the internal force of man dominance also grows. (A case of direct proportion) But for this please don't blame only men. We are just a part of a natural phenomenon just like in a bicycle, a pivot on the shaft of the elbow, which connects the pedal to the chain does not know which way the bicycle is moving. It's there executing its task in the best possible way without knowing the final effect of the effort it is putting in because it has been there since long and it has been made to work that way.

As I said earlier, given the power to do so, even a non-living thing like an elastic can show the resistance to change. Don't you think expecting a complete turn-around in men's psychology overnight is a little unfair?

We have been rigid and orthodox and hip and modernistic depending upon personal suitability and honestly speaking when I say "we" to an extent I am also a part of the community I am representing (I don't want to talk about the utter and complete liberalization of women when I myself do not have an absolutely rational psyche but if I say I am part of that community then I am among the ones on the circumference already trying to see things from a bigger perspective.

But, to a major extent it is because of the the way we are brought up, the way we are made to behave socially, and the way we grow up seeing things around us. But then, you might say "Guys, haven't you ever heard of something called being proactive?" Yes, we have and that's what we all are doing but then a process, which took hundreds of years to sink in can't be uprooted in day or two , even with the very high level of rationality and determination. We have been conditioned that way since ages ago and hence, this thought is very deep rooted or you can say it is not something we do with our conscious minds. It is something embedded in our subconscious minds that we exhibit in our behaviors.

I guess the race from mars is not as bad as it is considered to be. It is just in that intermediate phase of life, like a potter's pot, which appears to be something very absurd and ugly but actually is in the process of beautification.

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